5 Tips for a confidant of a woman who is a victim of domestic violence
I. Emergency cases
When violence has just occurred and the victim has injuries that require medical intervention, it is essential to support the victim to access medical care.
If the victim wishes, you can accompany him or her to the nearest police station to file a complaint.
It should be noted that in this case, the doctor is likely to support the victim in filing a complaint.
II. After medical care and in non-emergency cases
1. Listen - Be mindful
When a woman who has been subjected to domestic violence confides in you, it may be one of the first times she has spoken to a third party about what is happening in her intimacy. Pay attention and listen to her.
2. Reassurance - care
Comfort the victim with your reassuring presence. She is probably - and rightly so - very worried about what is going to happen. Anxiety increases even more when the couple has children.
Questions, uncertainties and fears beset her. This is not surprising.
You can reassure her that she will have your support and encourage her to seek answers from professionals.
3. Refer to experienced professionals
A sympathetic ear is probably the most valuable attention and response for a woman who has been subjected to domestic violence.
Then, it will be precious for her to be guided in finding professionals who will be able to answer her questions.
The free services can be reached at: 3919 where a counsellor will give you the contact details of local associations and the Centre d'Information des Droits des Femmes et des Familles.
The firm is at your service in these cases.
In any case, it is recommended that you contact professionals trained in the law for victims of domestic violence.
4. Don't question what she says
It may be tempting to question, to share your concerns about what the victim is saying. But it is important for her not to feel that she is not believed.
We know what we don't know: we don't know what happens when the doors are closed. Except when victims talk, send photos, write, show alarming symptoms etc.
Focus on getting the victim's testimony.
5. Don't put yourself at risk
It is important that you are aware of and respect your limits when supporting a woman who has been victim of domestic violence and that you communicate with her about this.
You can set a framework with her, for example by telling her when you are available to accompany her to her various appointments (police station, doctor, association), how she can reach you and at what times.
If she needs support at times when you cannot be available, remember to remind her of the emergency numbers.
You can also recommend that she uses an application such as app-elles.fr.
A woman who is a victim of domestic violence is a person whose boundaries have been violated in the most intimate sphere. Your behaviour can be an example, a source of inspiration for her, to help her heal and take care of herself.
Do you have any questions? Do not hesitate to contact the firm.
